Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Friday, October 20, 2017

Three Sisters/Two Generations/Countless Lifetimes

When I was small, I wished for a little sister. I had two brothers and a family dog, and I felt left out. I felt like I had lost someone in my life, and was sad that they were not here with me. I used to tell my parents I wanted a sister.

"The boys have each other, you two have each other, and all I have is the dog!" I would complain. (Sorry for all you dog lovers out there, but she was not my dog, she was there when I arrived. For the record, she was the best dog I've ever known.)

Very lucky for me, my parents did decide to have another child. By luck or by fate, they had a girl. They gave me my sister.


I was thrilled to find out on the day she was born that she was a girl. I remember it well, because I was actually sick that day with a stomach flu. I had to go to school anyway, as my parents didn't know what else to do with me! My mom had to go to the hospital!

My teacher knew the circumstances, and these were the days where there was less protocol, and more common sense. She let me rest whenever I needed, and told me I only had to do the work if I felt I could. I made it through the day and went off to the babysitter's house.
I was sleeping when my dad called to tell me I had a baby sister. He knew I would be so excited. I remember hearing the one sided phone conversation, but my sleep kept me from reacting. Until my babysitter patted my shoulder and said, "Deedee. You have a baby sister."

I smiled, feeling so excited that she was finally here, and went back to sleep.

To any outsider watching my reaction, they probably would have thought I didn't care much at all. Inside, I was elated. I loved her already, and we hadn't even met. She was the sister I always wanted.

I thought I was complete. Our family of 6 felt perfect. Two boys, two girls, and two parents. Of course, it wasn't always smooth and cheery. We had our times of arguing, and strife. But I always felt that my baby sister was here for me (even when she did what she wanted to do, instead of what I wanted her to do).


As I became an adult, I came to realize that she wasn't here for me exactly, of course, but we definitely were put here together on purpose. We have a connection much deeper than this life, for certain.

I thought the two of us were it, forever. No matter who else we ended up with, or where life might take us, we would always be a pair.



I was wrong.

Another thing I knew at a very young age, was that I wanted to have children some day. I knew this at the core of my soul, and I knew it would happen some day. My young adult self thought I had control over when it happened, and I guess to some degree, that's true. But when I think back on it with what I know now, I really didn't have a say in it at all.

I feel that what happens is agreed on ahead of time, and we stumble through this realm into the path we were meant to have (be it good, bad or ugly).

What I didn't realize is that perhaps I was still waiting for someone to arrive. Perhaps our sister pair was not quite the complete picture I thought it was.

My first pregnancy was ultra planned. I kept track of everything, as best as a Virgo can, and thought everything was perfect.
Do you think you're having a boy or a girl? Everyone loved to ask me that question.
How should I know? I've never been pregnant before, and I don't know what they feel like at all! Be it a girl or boy, I didn't care.

We went to my first ultrasound eager and excited. Soon to be grandparents joined us. The technician asked me several times if we wanted to know the sex. Yes! Who wants to wait any longer? (Several people, come to find out, like to wait until the baby is born. I couldn't wait another second.) As she was asking me if I was sure, I saw it all on screen. I looked at a picture of inside my belly to see inside my baby's belly, and saw... ovaries. There they were plain as day.
"Say it. Say it. It's a girl." I said in my head over and over. Apparently this woman wanted to be really sure I was sure. Then she told us we were having a girl, and that she looked good and everything was in its right place and right time.
Joy!
Every day from that time on was joyous.
When she was born, I woke up to every day feeling like Christmas for me. What will today bring? What will she do? What will she look like? What will I be able to show her? Every day for her first year held this bliss. (Aside from a lack of sleep, and trying to get myself back to work, and also building our own house all at that time.)




The parenting role happens so quickly, so tightly, so finite, I hardly noticed it being a role. Taking care of our children just became part of my life every day.
I became so-and-so's mom quickly, and it felt nice.
The years sometimes feel like they roll by like film in an old projector. It's quick, and there is a lot to see, with a definite story, not sure if you like it all or not, but then, next thing you know, 20 years have gone by. Yes, 20.





Conversations with my children have gone from me teaching and giving advice to them, to us discussing life and giving each other advice. It's freaking fabulous.





My daughter tells me I'm her best friend. When she first started telling me that, I thought, "How cute. She'll find someone she likes better some day. This won't last long."





She's 20, and she still tells me that. After many years of this, it dawned on me that she too is my best friend. When did that happen? Oh yeah, when life rolled by on the projector.
What do you know? I have two women in my life that are my best friends!







I had no idea that I'd been waiting for another sister to come into my life, and here she was! I feel so tied to these ladies, words cannot do justice to the bond I feel. There is definitely some past lives shared together here. There is a lot of love, caring, compassion. Even though we may have different titles here in this life, to me, we are always the three sisters.



Monday, February 9, 2015

In Love With Love


I love Valentine's Day.
Yep, I do.
Despite the commercialism.
Against the haters.
I'm in love with love.

I've loved the color red since I could remember. Growing up a redhead, I was always told I shouldn't wear red. I liked red. I settled for pink. I think by middle school 80% of my wardrobe was pink. The rest of it was green, as that's what looked good with red hair.
To this day, I love the combination of pink and green. Coincidence?


Last year I wrote about some of my memories about Valentine's Day, and why I love it. This year I continue to be excited about sharing the day with my family.
I like to think of Valentine's Day as a day to spend with those you love. You don't have to spend it with only one other, in a most romantic fashion, with flowers, candy and jewels. (Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't say no to any of it.)
Think of it as a time to be with anyone you love, even your favorite pet.
Even yourself.
The commercialism of this holiday has gone so overboard, every "single lady" out there hates on it. They feel sorry for themselves if they aren't receiving a bouquet of roses and a proposal in a glass of champagne.
Forget that!
Dump it!
Let it go!
Stick it to "the man"!
 Enjoy where you are, and who you are.

A couple years ago I designed shirts for my little ones. I was so excited to come up with the designs and see them come to life on the shirts! I got to make each one custom to them, and for less than $10 a piece.
Of course, I wrapped them over heart shaped boxes of chocolates too. I'm a sucker for the sweet thangs.
They loved them! They even wore them proudly the next day to school.
The real pleasure of the day was seeing their faces opening their gifts. Enjoying the love and happiness that came from something simple but meaningful.
The hub and I exchange gifts too. We try to keep it simple as well. There haven't been jewels for years. Flowers aren't my thing. Let's see, I believe the year before last was a pink PS3 controller.



The year before that was a bottle of marshmallow vodka. Mmm...that was yummy. I give him chocolate that usually sits around until the kids ask if they can have it.
This year I am keeping it simple again, with...well, I can't tell you, it would spoil the surprise. You can bet there will be something sweet with it though.


So this year, find your love. Whatever, wherever, whoever that might be.
XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Monday, October 20, 2014

COMBO! Personal Week and a Few of My Favorite Things

Today is my sister's birthday!
Happy birthday to her!



She's my only sister and I couldn't have asked for a better one (and I did ask for a sister)!
I thought today I would pay tribute to the awesomeness that is her!
I love making slide shows with photos! I found a bunch from the past and put them together into this grand slide show!
Enjoy!

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Monday, August 18, 2014

Summer Family Time



Yesterday was spent at the lake. Like so may other days in summer.
We met up with my whole, nuclear family to celebrate two next generation birthdays.
The next generation. They are here, and they are awesome.


I mean awesome in the true meaning of the word. They evoke awe in me and my generation.
Life is an amazing thing. When you can watch it happen, from the beginning, it is a privilege. So many changes, so much chaos. All as time goes consistently by.
Two births celebrated. One on her fifteenth year, the other on her third. A span of twelve years, but celebrating together. Watching my two nieces, my two Godchildren celebrate their lives was awesome.


I am appreciative of celebrations at the lake in the summer. We cram dozens of family into that tiny kitchen to sing happy birthday, and it’s always amazing to me. It’s a magic home of love and life.


There, you can see so much. There are all the stages of growing up, growing old, and many memories of those who have gone. They always come to join us for the celebrations. They are with us in words, stories, jokes, even poking fun at them in a happy, beautiful, funny way, bringing them to life at our parties.
I look at the children around the large, wooden table, whose faces are barely above the table’s horizon.


I smile.
That used to be me. Peering over to see the birthday guest blow out their candles. Having a grown up snap a candid shot. Feeling a little embarrassed by the moment.
I see the same feelings through my lens, but experience now the new feelings of the grown up who snapped the candid shot.


Awesome. Truly full of awe to live such a moment.
This week we will also celebrate my mother’s birthday. So many great people born this month! It will be another great day of celebration. Another great day of life.
It has become a popular phenomenon to write out a beautiful moment in your life here in the world wide web, and hash tag it, “blessed”. It is a wonderful thing that so many people out there are appreciating the little things in their lives. Of course, it gets abused, misused and overused. That’s the nature of us, after all. I still appreciate seeing people being thankful for what they have.
Happy even.
Blessed.
It’s those little things in our age of technology, plastics, fast services, instant gratifications, that make it come together in a way that no technology can do.
It is life.


Happening.
Consistent, but changing.
Always.

Monday, August 4, 2014

Late Night Chats



Flop on the bed
Lights are dim
It’s late
The boys off to dreamland.

Late night talking with my daughter.
My one and only girl.
So much feeling!
So much love!
So much chatting!

Friends
Foes
Loves
Losses
Pasts
Presents
And futures.

School
Summer
Plans
Tears
Spirits
Laughter
Love

So much love!

These are the moments
The times
I will never forget.
Even if there comes a day
That I don’t remember.

That love will never leave me.

Monday, June 30, 2014

Happy Independence Day!



As the week of our Independence Day, I thought I'd ask my 3 kids what they think of when they think of the 4th of July. Here's our top 10 list:

1. Going out in the boat on the lake. We are fortunate to have a family cottage that we spend the 4th of July on every year. These are where the memories happen.




2. Celebrating the hub's and his bro's birthday! Yep, my hub and his twin bro were really born on the 4th of July! How cool is that?





3. It is the celebration of our Independence Day. Even if we don't always know why that is important (which led to a good discussion of why it is).


4. FIREWORKS!!!




5. Cousins, cousins...and more cousins! We have had 1st, 2nd, 3rd and lots removed cousins visit us for the 4th!




6. Getting together and celebrating for all kinds of different reasons! The above mentioned Independence Day and the hub's birthday are just a couple of things we have celebrated over the years on the 4th of July! We've also had graduation parties, marriages, and babies celebrated as well, among others!


7. Spectacular familial intimacy. Seeing people we don't see any other time of year just come together, have some laughs and share stories.






8. Playing in the lake all day and night. It's a true pleasure and privilege to be able to do this!




9. Awesome food! Of course, with all these people, comes incredible food and drink! We have some dishes that we like to have year after year, and others that can be brand new! What are some of your faves?


10. The more the merrier! We have had hundreds of people over the many years of celebrating the 4th of July out at the cottage! We have met some very interesting, fascinating and totally cool people! We're even related to many of them!



Happy Fourth of July week!